Valentines Day is… interesting… to say the least.  We do not know much about any of the Saint Valentines for whom the holiday might have been named.  Various stories are told about why romantic love came to be associated with this particular day.  It is certainly impossible to overlook the reality that, at least at this point in history, Valentine’s Day is almost entirely defined by folks running businesses.  Yet, this weekend literally millions of us will feel obligated to celebrate love by sending cards and flowers, going on dates, eating fancy meals, gifting cheap mystery chocolates and giant red stuffed animals with hearts embroidered on their bottoms, and a whole host of other fun and exciting things.  And we will do all of this while our single friends are giving us their sage advice, “If you would have loved her like you should have all year, you wouldn’t have to have this special day.”

Now, I am admittedly cynical about this grand holiday.  The first Valentines gift I gave Annie, who surprisingly enough is now my wife, was a paper titled “The Death of Romance.”  However, even I have to admit that there is nothing wrong with setting aside special times to express your love for your spouse in special ways.  It might even be a good idea.

The Bible tells us that marriage is a picture of the church.  Paul writes, “²⁵Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, ²⁶that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, ²⁷so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.  ²⁸In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies.  He who loves his wife loves himself.  ²⁹For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, ³⁰because we are members of his body.  ³¹’Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’  ³²This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.  ³³However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband” (Ephesians 5.25-33, ESV).

It is not too much to say that when husbands take pleasure in loving their wives sacrificially and selflessly they are playing out the awe-inspiring love of Jesus Christ for his bride, the church.  Nor is it too much to say that when wives take pleasure in resting in the love of their husband they are playing out a life lived in the security of what our Savior has done for us.

So, men, take advantage of this special day and take pleasure in loving your wife – not with a pre-packaged love, but with a sacrificial and selfless love, not for what you may get in return, but because it is your pleasure to love her, and not because she deserves it, but because you have called her your bride.

Need some resources to begin thinking in the right direction?  Read and study Song of Solomon, John 3.16, 1 Corinthians 13.4-7, and Ephesians 5.25-33.  Be satisfied with God’s love and glorify him by exemplifying with your own bride the love that Jesus Christ has for his bride, the church.